The 25% Rule of Educating My Kids

Education.  It is one of the top responsibilities of a parent.  Along with feeding, clothing and caring for your children, educating them is YOUR job.
News flash people. It is not the government’s job. It is not your church’s job.  The responsibility of education your child, first and foremost, falls on you. The parents. I want you to think about that for a minute. Education your children is your job. I’m not saying that you are required to drop all that you are doing and devote every moment to instilling information and wisdom in your kids. I mean, you can if you want to. I am certainly not saying that you are responsible for physically teaching them every single thing either.  I believe that exposure to different people as teachers is absolutely necessary.  What I’m saying is that the decision and dedication of the education process for your child falls on you first.

The reality is that as a parent you have to invest in your child’s education.  That is what I’m saying. For me, I believe that it is easily understood if we recognize that we need to dedicate 25% to your children’s education.  Now, you get to choose what 25% that will be, and there lies the choice that people get judgey about. Maybe if I lay it out this way, we can back off and respect each other for whatever 25% fits your family.
Here’s your choice.
You can spend 25% of your time homeschooling. Covering topics and material to instill the information that they need for future success. This involves finding teachers/classes/groups and lessons outside the home. It can be a lot of fun and a fantastic community.
You can spend 25% of your time in working and earning money to send them to a private school that fits your values in life and education, has clubs and teams and maybe a more tight knit community.
You can spend 25% of your time in supplementing public schooling with extra education and morals, group activities that may or may not be connected with your school or church.
No matter how you do it, it takes a huge chunk to do it right.  In my mind it takes roughly 25% of something, usually in time. No one ever does it perfectly, and no one knows exactly what 25% is going to fit into YOUR family’s resources of time, energy and money.  This is where the comparisons start. In immediately judging someone for what 25% they choose.
My 25% is somewhat different.  It’s really 12.5% home and 12.5% public(charter) school, then I add an extra 5% by teaching religious education at our church, which has a large Catholic school where the majority of the children we see attend.
So, I’m a bystander in all three camps. I see the families and am involved but nowhere dedicated or completely included in any.  But I see the division, misunderstanding and preconceived notions of each.
The homeschoolers ask me, “Why don’t you just pull them out? You can TOTALLY do it!”  Yeah, I could do it. That is not the best choice for their needs at this time. As much as I really hate the driving, making lunches and doing homework after a full day of homeschooling, this delicate balance has my children growing and thriving.
The public schoolers still feel awkward. I see it in their eyes, “Does she think she’s better? Is the school not good enough? Why doesn’t she just send them all back and be done with it?”  Yes, I think I am better. AT THIS TIME and FOR MY CHILDREN, at this time I am better.  No, I don’t think the school is good enough for what THESE CHILDREN need AT THIS TIME.  That could change, but it hasn’t. It’s how I choose to spend my 25% on my kids.
Now in the last year I’ve had my first exposure to the private schoolers.  “You know we have scholarships? It wouldn’t be that expensive.” “Oh (child) asked if Big Sister and Braniac would be coming to school finally next year. You should just apply and try it out!! We love it!”  Yep. I know you do. I love seeing how your 25% is working for your family.  That’s not my 25%.  That’s not what we want to invest in.
The thing is that I love all of these groups. I see beauty and strength in ALL of them. I see children and families thriving in each, but there are also some that are not.  My charge you to is to take the time to be aware of your 25% investment.  Be intentional about it, and thankful for it.  Don’t compare it to anyone else’s investment and don’t take what their family chooses as a standard.  We all have our own balance to keep.  The more we focus on confidence in our own, the less we have to worry about what is working for the others.
Our family is happy with our split and how it is working.  I never imagined it would work but it is and I have no intention of changing it right now.  It’s sometimes bittersweet and painful to not be “in” anywhere. That’s been the story of my life so I’m ok with that. I just don’t fit a mold.
I am aware that I talk about homeschooling more. That’s where I spend most of my time.   I do believe in more cases than are admitted, homeschooling is the best we can do for our children.  I also openly say that some homeschooling is screwed up and a mess. I’ve seen it and it scares me, as much as the screwed up messes that happen in public schools.
Many public schools, as we are all aware, have some serious issues mixed into the good they do. Ours does and I spend the time working with that and don’t deny that it exists. I don’t for a second discredit a family who chooses that route for their 25% investment.
Private schools sometimes lean toward a snobbery and elitist attitude. I worked in a public school for a year, managing the school cafeteria and if you had any idea what some of those kids were talking about….well. It’s not all peaches and cream under those blazers, I assure you.  Seriously. But I see parents who are working that out with their kids and investing their 25% wisely.
So,  claim your 25% with pride. Don’t knock it. Don’t tell people you would have loved to homeschool, but…. It’s ok! You are investing. Don’t discredit it.  homeschoolers, don’t tell the private schoolers “We would have tried that but…”  It’s not what works for your family. Own what you are investing. Don’t compare it. Just invest.
Some Related Posts:
Putting My Money Where My Mouth Is Which Translates Into Public School 
Kinder-huh?
Waiting For SuperMom
Raise Your Hand If Your Hands Are Full
The 25% Rule of Educating My Kids
Back To School, Errrr Back Home, Homeschool