Down Sydrome Down The Stairs

These feet weren’t made for walkin’. They run circles around whatever life throws at Mozy!

I almost didn’t even notice.

We wake Mozart so early to prepare for the bus that I often cave to his sweet begging to be carried down the stair in a big snuggling hug.

I know that’s not the best for him. He needs to go down those stairs on his own two feet.

Why?
Why would a mama think it’s so important to force a sleepy-eyed boy to walk down the stairs at the what-crack of dawn when she could carry him? Why would a mama refuse to hold her son at such a sweet time?

It’s one of those tiny complications of special needs parenting that are often too veiled in minutia to bring up in conversation. We don’t have the time to explain every idiosyncrasy of the walk with exceptions in parenting, so we don’t even tell you these things. We are too busy doing the actual things of special needs parenting.

However, I’m going to give you a minute of my specially-needed time to share this bit of insight. I believe it’s important to all parenting.

Descending steps is hard. Neurologically a child should have developed by the age of three to know how to descend steps properly. Could Mozart descend steps at three? Absolutely, with speed and relish he could. The problem is that he did it incorrectly, two feet to each step, or right foot always leading.
The human brain is an amazing mystery and I often wonder if humans will ever stop studying and learning about it, even in a million years. There will always be more that we do not know. But what we do know is that brain development in these early years is crucial for lifelong skills and behaviors. If my son isn’t teaching his brain to move his feet in alternating steps down those stairs now, it will affect his abilities at 30 years old. We must exercise those muscles.
So starting at 3 years old when Mozy was first enrolled in special needs preschool, I have walked him down those stairs by hand every school day and worked with reminders to alternate his feet.

He didn’t listen. He didn’t get it. I think it was another year and a half before he even understood that I wanted him to change feet, and another year before he attempted it regularly.

Because Down Syndrome people love to be happy. Learning to switch feet when he doesn’t understand why or see a need is absolutely useless to him. He knows how to get down those steps himself, and changing HIS WAY does not make him happy.
Not happy?
Not interested.
If you’ve had a child with this type of stubbornness, you know what I mean.

Today Mozart is 6 1/2 years old. We’ve been walking this walk down the stairs with Down Syndrome for over three years of schooling. It’s so routine to see those feet hop down and correct him that I don’t even hear my own voice anymore.

Today I almost missed it.
Today my son jumped out of bed, grabbed my hand, and he led ME. He marched one-foot-per-step down the stairs proclaiming, “School! Me! Eat!“

School and eat. Favorite things.

But I did catch it and as a reward, I grabbed him up and danced wildly through the living room. I held him, snuggled him and celebrated his achievement of walking on his own two feet.

People, this was worth every dreary morning of, “Mama, hug?” that I had to turn down in love for him, knowing it’s my job to let him use his feet.

Stepping back and letting him descend those steps is a parenting achievement that could have been missed. It’s hard to wait 3.5 years for such a thing.

Trying every day without fail for 3.5 years to do something like stepping down the stairs on little feet is hard work for my son, and he’s so proud of himself today.

There is so much strength in learning something right, no matter how long it takes you. I know it is true. I learned this from my son.